Any Friend of Tookey

Slide28

Day 28, Play 28: Any Friend of Tookey…

Two men sit at a bar, facing the audience. They are
MATT GOTTSHALK and DOUG MALLARD, drinking
quietly and talking low.

MALLARD:
You the guy Tookey said?

GOTTSCHALK:
Yeah.

MALLARD:
Tookey said you need papers.

GOTTSCHALK:
Yeah, Took said you could hook me up.

MALLARD:
You tight with the Took?

GOTTSCHALK:
I must be. This is a solid.

(beat)

MALLARD:
Your name?

GOTTSCHALK:
Matt Gottschalk.

MALLARD:
No! I mean, in your name, or an assumed name?

GOTTSCHALK:
Assumed name.

MALLARD:
Okay. Any old name, or you got preferences?

GOTTSCHALK:
Specifically, Paul Gottschalk.

(beat)

MALLARD:
Relation?
GOTTSCHALK:
He’s my brother.

MALLARD:
Won’t he be needing his identity?

GOTTSCHALK:
He’s dead.

(beat)

MALLARD:
How’d that happen?

GOTTSCHALK:
In a way so as he won’t be needing his identity.

(beat)

MALLARD:
So: What? Standard DMV, his name, your picture? Social. You want credit cards?

GOTTSCHALK:
No, I’ll use his.

MALLARD:
But you need other gee gaws in your wallet. Spare business cards, maybe  a family picture. None of ‘em have to be functional, they’re just dressing, so to speak.

GOTTSCHALK:
Set dressing. Interesting. Yeah. Just so the document itself doesn’t come under question. I want a clear trail of him exiting the country.

MALLARD:
So you want the ID to get flagged for investigation later, but pass closer inspection now.

GOTTSCHALK:
You got it. Paper trail of his exit via Toronto. Maybe Montreal.

(beat)

MALLARD:
What really happened to him?

GOTTSCHALK:
Some bad debts and things. He shot himself.

MALLARD:
But you don’t want him to be dead.

GOTTSCHALK:
No.

MALLARD:
It won’t make trouble for the wife and kids?

GOTTSCHALK:
His? No he’s got nothing.

(beat)

MALLARD:
I can have this for you in two days.

GOTTSCHALK:
Tookie said if I paid extra, you could expedite. If an indictment is handed down before I get the ID, they’ll flag me at the border. Our friend said you might swing it, for a price.

MALLARD:
But you’re not my friend. And I want to know more about your brother.

GOTTSCHALK:
I didn’t have anything to do with it, if that’s what you mean. I mean, he suggested it. He looked at it the same way I did. We were both going to be ruined. One of us could make it look like we did it alone and hid it from the other one. Give the other guy an out.

MALLARD:
So he just elected to do that, did he?

GOTTSCHALK:
We flipped. He lost.

MALLARD:
Why didn’t he just leave the country for real?

GOTTSCHALK:
He didn’t steal enough to live abroad. Even alone.

MALLARD:
You take out an insurance policy or something?

GOTTSCHALK:
That would have been smart. Didn’t think of that.

MALLARD:
Next time, come to the professionals first. Paul Gottschalk, right?

GOTTSCHALK:
I got his information here.

GOTTSCHALK hands him a thick envelope.

MALLARD:
Two days, tops. We don’t get it in one, you pay the regular rate.

GOTTSCHALK:
How will I know?

MALLARD:
You come by in a few days and say you lost your ID. They look in the lost and found drawer. And there you are.

GOTTSCHALK:
Okay.

(beat)

MALLARD:
How’d he do it?

GOTTSCHALK:
Drove off into the desert somewhere. Took his Glock with him. They’ll never find him. If they don’t, it’ll be seven years before they declare him—

GOTTSCHALK chokes up.

MALLARD:
Dead.

GOTTSCHALK:
Yeah.

MALLARD downs his drink, rattles his ice.
sets his drink on the counter.

MALLARD:
Your brother didn’t lose that flip.

MALLARD exits. GOTTSCHALK stares out.

LIGHTS FADE TO BLACK. END OF PLAY.

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